I'm ten days away from being with Zachary again. The feeling is so overwhelming. In so many ways I feel like he's been gone forever with everything that's happened, but I also feel like he just left with how busy I've been. I cannot wait to be in his arms again, even if we only have 36 hours together before he starts AIT. I don't think anyone understands my excitement :)

Kathryn and I were talking about how I feel about Zach being so far away. She made the comment that she doesn't understand how I do it, that just being 45 minutes away from Brent and being able to see him virtually whenever she wants is hard for her because she already misses him.

It really got me thinking, I do it because I have to. Well I don't have to, I could walk away at any point. I love him though. He's everything and more that I've ever looked for in a man. He's confident, caring, compromising, and he loves me for me. Who I am. I could walk away, but I can't. Given my choices, I'll stick it out for us. I can make it through being apart for so long because as much as I love him, he's not my entire world. I have school, work, family, and friends to keep me occupied. I have a career that I want to pursue. I have this time to really grow up as a person, become the woman I want to be, while he has time to serve his country and become the man he is destined to be. While we're doing this growing up physically apart, as a couple we're growing together. The separation is not easy, it's the hardest thing I've ever done, but I also know that the rewards we'll reap at the end are more than worth it. As Zach told me, "Keep your chin up, 4 years is nothing compared to a lifetime." So to answer Kathryn's question, I do it because I believe in us, I believe in him. I see him as not only my boyfriend, but my hero. He's defending our country, and if I have to be second in his life to the Army for a little while, I'm okay with it. I know that one day I'll be his number one. This time will make us or break us, and I think we're both strong enough to make it out on the otherside.

I'm not saying it's going to be easy. I know it's going to be hard. I know it's a challenge, but I also believe that God will not bring you to something that he's not going to bring you through it. So to make a long answer short, I do it because I have to. I have to be strong.